If you have Christmas traditions, I am sure you are in the midst of them now! My extended family just had an early Christmas celebration. I remember being at these parties as a child, listening to stories about family members that lived and died before I was born and thinking that I could not imagine life without the faces telling the stories. Now, I am the one with tears in my eyes remembering parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents from Christmases gone by. I am a Grandma and my children are the middle generation. The traditions of Christmas still make for a wondrous time. The past, present and future come together in magical moments that we will remember all year.
We will have more of these moments at Hope & A Future where we celebrate with our Family Of Friends. These friends of all ages have come into our lives through the work and living we do here. We have shared fun and hard times together. And, we have said goodbye to many loved ones who live on in our hearts, memories and the traditions we share.
Intentional intergenerational friends share like extended families share. At Hope & A Future we have created a place where the generations come together. As a result, we experience many of the same benefits extended families enjoy. In other blog posts I have shared how loneliness is combatted when we bring young and old together. And how children and frail seniors flourish in the loving presence of each other. But there are more age groups benefitting. Young adults and middle aged people live better when they live intergenerationally too. It turns out that their mental health is positively impacted in multiple ways. Adolescents sometimes go through a time when they think they have superior knowledge over all generations. Mark Twain is credited with saying, “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” So, by the time adolescents become young adults and enter the world of employment, relationships and raising children, most are ready to hear how the older adults around them have dealt with life. And, when given the opportunity, they are likely to become helpful to older adults. Their physical strength and flexibility can be extremely helpful! Receiving thanks and praise for helpful efforts can give young adults improved self-esteem, while guidance helps them think about and navigate life’s challenges and storms. Plus, they may get help with child care too! Older adults with new young friends may feel like they have a new spring in their step. They can enjoy generativity–the sense of helping and teaching the next generation. Every generation stands to benefit from intentional intergenerational friends. The brilliant result is that they all become more resilient–together.
I am struck by the parallels of intergenerational gifts between family and friends and the gift of Christmas. Welcoming Intergenerational family and friends in relationships of kindness and affectionate regard means a person belongs. Families of blood and friendship welcome children with rejoicing. They watch and nurture children and young adults with anticipation as they embark on their journey to find their place in the world. Older Adults are armed with confident expectations and are thrilled to be included in their lives. And when they leave us, we remember them. This is how we love our neighbors, all of our neighbors. And this is how we help all generations have hope for their future.
I hope you have a wonderful intergenerational holiday season!
Karin
P.S.
In the last month the Capital Times published a beautiful article about our model. Since then we have heard from new friends who are interested in learning more. If you have a group that would like to learn more, we have a new 20 minute slide show we would be happy to share at your meeting or gathering. Please contact us at [email protected]
One more P.S.
If you are interested in reading more about how intergenerational adults help each other, please take a look at this research forwarded by Paula Reif, Hope & A Future Cofounder.